My Star- Lesbian Relationship :: Personal Narrative Relationships Papers

My Star I sat on the edge of her bed, with my head in my hands, crying. My heart was pounding and adrenaline rushed through my veins, making me feel sick to my stomach. I couldn't make myself calm down. I couldn't even take a breath. My hands trembled as I wiped the hair out of my eyes. I glanced through my tears at Star, huddled in the corner of her bright yellow room. She was curled up in a ball with her head on her knees, shaking. I stared, wondering what she was thinking, and what I should do. I wanted so badly to go comfort her as we both cried, but I felt as though I could never touch her again. I felt dirty, even evil. I began to question every belief I'd ever had, even who I was. I looked back down to the ground, and watched everything fade away as more tears formed in my eyes. I wanted to just disappear, to leave my body behind, and not have to deal with what was about to happen. My roommate Star and I had decided to go to Tampa to visit her family for the weekend. She stood over my bed one Friday morning, watching me sleep. I opened my eyes and smiled expecting her to crawl in like she did every morning after her first class, but instead she asked " You wanna come to Tampa with me?" She had a huge, fake smile on her face, as if she was saying please. I didn't hesitate. "Sure," I said as I made room for her next to me. How could I say no to Star, especially when she smiled at me like that? I didn't care where we were going, but I knew I didn't want to spend a weekend with out her. Star was the only child of two extremely religious parents, and attended Catholic school her whole life. She was very sheltered, and modest, whereas I am a very open-minded, liberal person, who is anything but modest. She was Hispanic, and had dark brown, short, curly hair, that she always hid with a bandana. Her eyes were almost black, and were so mysterious and deep that I could stare into them and get lost. She wore pointy, black glasses that I called her "sassy librarian glasses." She dressed how my friends would describe as "dykey.